Love Island USA’s Sexy Covers Of ’90s Pop Songs Will Give Millennials A Sense Of Age

So you look love island usa Season 4 on Peacock, and Brazilian hunk Felipe puts the moves on lone hottie Courtney — and she returns the favor with every one of those moves. They just had a steamy time during a kissing game and it looks like things are heating up again. The two grow closer and closer as a seductive piano tune plays. And as these two gorgeous people finally join lips after a tense week, you realize… you know that song. Oh my God, you know that song!

Felipe and Courtney make out with Sex and Candy
Photo: Peacock

Yeah – it’s a sultry cover of “Sex & Candy”, Marcy Playground’s infamous jangly, non-sequitur rock nugget. And instead of focusing on this the island of love wants you to focus on (sexy people doing sexy things, especially sexy things that maybe they shouldn’t be doing) you spend the rest of that makeup session trying to clear your brain of l image of this nerdy singer sticking his head out of a beetle juice landscape like a tarantula meanders.

Such is the curse of being an old millennial who watches love island usa!

The most of the island of love needle drops are fine. Hell, some of them are awesome! Lizzo and Kim Petras? It’s the perfect summer soundtrack for a summer series. The majority of the songs are the kind of generic club bops and sensible (i.e. approachable) ballads you hear all the time on shows like sell sunset. And then, usually once per episode, there’s a piece of song that’s so unnerving that every recoupment decision seems sensible by comparison. Deb: Why are you still with Jesse? He will never put you first!

Take, for example, the redirection of Britney Spears’ “Toxic” for the recap of Episode 9.

toxic love island
Photo: Peacock

This version from the German songwriting duo known as 2WEI slows down one of Britney’s best bops and pushes it through what I can only describe as a vampire filter. That’s also how I describe this cover of “Sex & Candy”. These two songs sound like they were sung by Drusilla from buffy the vampire slayerperhaps in a mausoleum lit only by dragon-shaped candles.

The vampire filter is applied to “Ready or Not” by the Fugees (or the Delfonics, a cover of a cover), also in Episode 9.

Bryce and Jeff entering Ready or Not
Photo: Peacock

The arrival of studs Bryce and Jeff features a dark, aggressive take on the R&B classic that makes singer Esthero sound like he’s out for blood (which would make sense, because vampires).

But not every song from the 90s is reimagined as a slow dance moment for Blade of vampire night club. Watch this Episode 2 prep montage. Shots of the islanders getting ready for a night of drinking and questionable decisions with…

Love Island with Lovefool
Photo: Peacock

… a hypnotic dance cover of “Lovefool” by The Cardigans. This sweet ballad from the Swedish rock band (and I use the term “rock” generously) is almost unrecognizable in this form. It sounds like the kind of song that would be played in a club where members of the Cardigans would never go, mainly because they’re all in bed by 9 p.m.

But of all these covers, there’s only one that matches the WTF spirit of “Sex & Candy.” After a shocking re-coupling, Mady tries to come to terms with the fact that Andy dumped her out of nowhere to team up with Sydney. The other girls try to comfort Mady and, like in the last three minutes of every episode of Full house, sensitive piano music comes into play. But it’s not just any sensitive piano music. No, it’s the intro of a cover of…

Cover of Love Island, The Sign
Photo: Peacock

…the irresistible uptempo Europop earworm “The Sign” from Ace of Base. As sung by Katie Boeck, this version of “The Sign” approaches Sarah McLachlan’s levels of sensitive sentimentality. As I said earlier, I don’t need to be reminded of Ace of Base during this time. I want to feel what Mady is feeling right now, not spend the whole scene struggling to remember what the two guys from Ace of Base even did (apart from gesticulating during the clips).

The problem is that I connect love island usa not to think a single thought, but I get overwhelmed with way too many thoughts every time the show releases one of these reimagined 90s tunes. Does the show think they’re tricking me into thinking “Sex & Candy” is actually a sexy song? Are they saving tons of money on licensing by going with the disastrous version of “Toxic”? Do kids even know who Ace of Base is? Am I old? I am old!

I know that last part to be true because a number of YouTube videos for these covers have million views. Somehow they’re as popular as the originals with part of this generation, and my old ass is five years late to the party and only hears the song on love island usa. I know I’m old the island of love. I don’t need any musical cues to remind me of that, not when literally everything else in the series already does! I’m old and I spend my adulthood watching 20s in bathing suits embrace everything with a pulse the island of love. Oh my God.

But, you know, whatever – those moments of audio incongruity (with a hint of existential panic) add a bizarre layer of surprise to every episode of love island usa, and that’s fine with me. Now I wonder what cover I’ll hear next, a party rock remix of Hootie’s “Let Her Cry” or a hot, sexy rendition of Deadeye Dick’s “New Age Girl.”

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